Dear Tide...
I am writing to say what an excellent product you have!
I've used it all of my married life, as my Mom always
told me it was the best. Now that I am in my fifties
I find it even better! In fact, about a month ago,
I spilled some red wine on my new white blouse.
My inconsiderate and uncaring husband started
to belittle me about how clumsy I was,
and generally started becoming a pain in the neck.
One thing led to another and somehow I ended up
with his blood on my new white blouse!
I grabbed my bottle of Tide with bleach alternative,
to my surprise and satisfaction, all of the stains came out!
In fact, the stains came out so well
the detectives who came by yesterday
told me that the DNA tests on my blouse
were negative and then my attorney called
and said that I was no longer considered a suspect
in the disappearance of my husband.
What a relief!
Going through menopause is bad enough
without being a murder suspect!
I thank you, once again, for having a great product.
Well, gotta go, have to write to the Hefty bag people.
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