President Obama is beginning to realize that the prohibition of extending federal benefits and responsibilities to non heterosexual couples is unconstitutional under the 14th Amendment equality clause. He is also realizing it is immoral to discriminate against them as well, which is what the Defense of Marriage Act does.
There is really a very simple solution to this whole argument.
All laws regarding the bonding of two human beings are separated from religious connotations and remain within the civil laws only.
By that I mean, any human beings of the minimum legal age of their state or older are required to go to their county recorder and sign the civil marriage contract certificate that in effect creates a single entity of the individuals into one, as does our current civil laws do regarding taxation, property ownership, property transfer, inheritance, medical decision making, etc. No ceremony is performed, it is just a civil transactional process.
The individual can then choose to have whatever style or type of celebration they so choose, be it religious, a big party, or whatever.
Religious organizations would be exempt from recognizing any civil marriage within the tenants of their faiths, with the exception of when such comes in conflict with civil law, such as property ownership and transfer, etc.
The individuals may have a religious marriage at any time, however these marriages would not be recognized by civil law or have any force or effect of a civil marriage. Religious marriages would only considered as a religious ceremony and the act of faith under the law. In order for the individuals to obtain the civil benefits and responsibilities of marriage, they would have to go to the county recorder and sign the civil marriage contract certificate. The legal effective date of their marriage would be the date they signed the civil marriage contract certificate.
The religious individual may use the date of their religious marriage as their anniversary date, but for legal proceedings, it would be the date they sign the civil marriage contract certificate.
This is how most European countries do it to preserve the separation of church and state. It has worked very nicely for nearly 200 years. Even Prince William and Kate Middleton must go to the government offices and sign the marriage contract, completely separate from the religious marriage they will perform. Likewise, the only marriage that the legal system will recognize is the civil one done at the government offices. If royalty must go through this process, why should we be any different? The right wingers would say.. "Oh we can't do anything that Western Europe does, because they are evil socialists."
Some say that will open the door to polygamy. So what, if the individuals entering into the civil marriage are of age and do so of their own free will, then why not? Who is to say it is wrong. It is only the ones that force underage girls to marry that is abhorrent and those who are forced to marry someone not of their choice. Other than that, it is none of my or the governments business who people love and who want to be in a lasting relationship.
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